Q:What's the difference between a hockey game and a prize fight?
A:In a hockey game, the fights are real.

lol
GSA

Another one!!



GSA

wo guys from Ottawa die and wake up in hell. The devil stops in to check on them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens and toques warming themselves around the fire. The devil asks, "Isn't it hot enough for you?" They reply, "'Well, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit eh". The devil decides they aren't miserable enough and turns up the heat. The next morning, there they are, still in parkas, toques and mittens. The devil asks again, "It's awfully hot down here, can't you guys feel it?" Again they reply, "Well, like we told ya, we're from Canada, land of ice and snow, and we're just happy for a chance to warm up a little, eh." This gets the devil steamed up. He cranks the heat up as high as it will go. People are wailing and screaming. He finds the two Canadians in light jackets, grilling sausages and drinking beer. The devil is astonished. "Everyone down here is in misery, and you two seem to be enjoying yourselves." The two Canadians reply, "We don't get much warm weather in Ottawa. We've just got to have a cook-out when the weather is THIS nice." The devil is furious, and decides to turn all the heat off in hell. The next morning, icicles are everywhere, people are unable to do anything but wail, moan and gnash their teeth. The devil smiles. He finds the two Canadians back in their parkas, toques and mittens. But now they are jumping up and down, cheering, yelling and screaming like mad men! The Devil is dumbfounded. "When I turn up the heat you're happy. Now it's freezing and you're still happy. What is wrong with you two?" The two guys from Ottawa look at the devil in surprise, "Don't you know? If Hell freezes over, it must mean the Sens have won the Stanley Cup.

the jokes are pretty good. i think the pictures are even better!

Some jokes I just found on a leafs forum:

What do the Ottawa Senators and the Titanic have in common?
They both look good until they hit the ice!

Why do Bruins fans drink from a saucer?
Because the cup's always in Montreal!

What's the difference between the Calgary Flames and a bra?
A bra has 2 cups!

Why is the Hockey Hall Of Fame in Toronto?
It's the only way Leafs fans can get to see the Stanley Cup!


GSA

hope this one hasn't been told yet
An Edmonton Oilers fan, a St. Louis Blues fan, a Detroit Red Wings
fan, and a Colorado Avalanche fan climbed to the top of Mount Everest.
They looked over the edge in wonder. Then the Oilers fan shouts, "This
is for the Oilers!" and jumps off the cliff.
Well, the St. Louis fan, not wanting to be outdone, shouts, "This is for
the Blues!" and jumps to his death.
Seeing the trend, the Avalanche fan looks around for a moment. Then he
walks behind the Red Wings fan, gives him a big shove off the mountain
and yells, "This is for hockey fans everywhere!"

Top 25 Reasons Hockey is Better Then Sex
25. It's ok to bleed during play.

24. If it's a bad game, you can call a time out.

23. Every player usually has two or three sticks to choose from.

22. There is a limit to the sizes of all equipment.

21. You can still play when you get married.

20. You can change on the fly.

19. Anytime you see an open net, you can go for it.

18. If you can't get it up, who cares?

17. You can score on all the teams in the league over and over.

16. You can pull the goalie without getting yelled at!

15. It is broadcast live on TV.

14. Everyone can shoot at the same goal.

13. You can shoot in the goal and it's a good thing!

12. Because of the facemask, nothing can get in your eyes!

11. You always know how big the stick is

10. It's legal to play hockey professionally.

9. The puck is always hard.

8. Protective equipment is reusable and you don't even have to wash it.

7. It lasts a full hour.

6. You know you're finished when the buzzer sounds.

5. Your parents cheer when you score.

4. When you're tired you're supposed to get off and let a buddy take your place.

3. You can count on it at least twice a week.

2. You can tell your friends about it afterwards.

And, the number one reason hockey is better than sex...

1. A two-on-one or three-on-one is not uncommon.

sweet, i'll have to let the wife read that one

thanks, i thought it was hilarious when i first saw it

An oldie from Alberty:

Q: Why doesn't Red Deer have an NHL team?
A: Because then Calgary would want one.

Andy came to work one day, limping something awful. One of his co-workers, Josh, noticed and asked Andy what happened. Andy replied, "Oh, nothing. It's just an old hockey injury that acts up once in a while."

Josh said, "Gee, I never knew you played hockey."

Andy responded, "No I don't. I hurt it last year when I lost $100 on the Stanley Cup play-offs. I put my foot through the television."